If your child is struggling, the default advice you’ll hear is often:
“Have you tried therapy?”
For some young people, therapy is exactly the right step. It can be life-changing.
But not every struggling young person needs therapy straight away.
And not every young person is ready for it.
That distinction matters more than you might realise.
Over the last decade, awareness around youth mental health has grown and that’s a good thing.
But something subtle has happened alongside it.
Struggle has become automatically medicalised.
Low mood? Therapy.
Anxiety before exams? Therapy.
Motivation collapse? Therapy.
Friendship breakdown? Therapy.
Sometimes that’s right.
But sometimes what’s actually happening is this:
Your child isn’t coping.That’s different from being clinically unwell.
Many young people who look “anxious” are actually overwhelmed.
Many who look “depressed” are stuck in avoidance cycles.
Many who seem unmotivated have lost structure.
Many who withdraw are struggling with confidence or executive functioning.
These are coping and functioning problems before they are psychiatric problems.
Therapy works best when a young person is ready to explore insight, patterns and deeper emotional material.
But some young people need something more immediate and practical first:
That’s not denial. That’s proportionality.
Another reality many parents don’t say out loud:
Some young people try therapy and it doesn’t stick.
Not because therapy is flawed.
But because:
Therapy without follow-through can feel like understanding without change.
In those cases, the issue isn’t depth. It’s implementation.
Instead of asking:
“Does my child need therapy?”
Try asking:
“What level of support is proportionate right now?”
Sometimes the answer is therapy.
Sometimes it’s structured, practical coaching that helps your child:
Sometimes it’s both.
The key is sequencing and fit, not default escalation.
Coping capacity is the foundation beneath everything else.
It includes:
Without these, even the best therapy can struggle to take root.
When coping strengthens:
Sometimes the most responsible step isn’t deeper, it’s steadier.
Choosing coaching or practical support first doesn’t mean you are avoiding therapy.
It means you are calibrating intervention.
It means you are asking:
Proportionate care protects your child from being over-medicalised and protects therapy for when it is truly needed.
Responsible support means:
It means your child isn’t left waiting. And it means you are not forced into an all-or-nothing choice.
Many parents sense something isn’t right, but also feel uncertain about escalation.
That uncertainty doesn’t mean you are minimising. It means you are thinking carefully.
The most helpful next step is often not “start therapy immediately.”
It’s:
“Let’s work out what level of support fits.”
At Synapse, that’s exactly where we begin.
We look at whether your child’s difficulties are primarily about coping and daily functioning, or whether they require clinical treatment. If therapy is the right step, we will say so. If structured, practical coaching is more proportionate right now, we will explain why.
There is no pressure to escalate. There is no pressure to commit.
Just a conversation about what support is appropriate for your child, at this stage.
Because the goal isn’t more intervention, it’s the right intervention.
